The Phoenix

We’ve all heard of the mythical Phoenix, a bird that ignites in flames and it’s old and tattered being giving birth to a new more beautiful than ever self…

I believe we are all a Pheonix in our own rights…

Using wisdom from mistakes, trials and tribulations to rebirth and create a better self.

The flames are painful to say the least. Leaving behind all that we know, albeit not pretty and unsure of if we will come out the other side of the flames intact or carrying who we were before it’s a huge leap of faith to enter the flames of change.

Inside the flames we are unable to see how we are changing, charred and screaming out for help. Doing things our normal selves wouldn’t even think of doing, turning into our worst selves before hitting bottom, losing all of our feathers and choosing to let it all go and fall into ashes….

Some of our lost feathers are our friends. We cling tight to them attempting to retain something familiar, something of comfort not realizing the very thing we are holding onto is what is holding us back in the first place.

Finally all the feathers fall. The fire burns hot and we surrender to the death of who we once were. Who maybe we never should have been in the first place. Out of the ashes comes what we perceive as an ugly featherless bird surrounded by dark ashes that have fallen to all sides and created a dirty path for us to walk out of the shadows from…

We begin our journey to rebirth with each step away leaving the dirty charred ashes in our past…

Sometimes we even carry the ashes hoping to put ourselves back together and recognize who we once were but it’s hopeless…

We are stubborn and driven. We thrive on success and we can not accept failure or leaving things behind…

But one day you look back on all you left behind and see the flowers budding up from the ashes, the flowers of the past that are happy memories to look back on but memories that belong where they sit, in the past. Going back only causes you to relive the pain of your death and suffer the grief and guilt of your own mistakes and loss of friendships you once had.

You look in the mirror and turn around in haste searching for the beautiful creature staring back at you in the mirror. You don’t recognize this person who has no outside evidence of the pain you inflicted upon yourself. The damage you’ve done to yourself and those around you because you have forgiven yourself and allowed yourself to grow new more beautiful, more vibrant feathers than ever before.

You’ve grown into a mythical creature of change and grown. A creature the heavy black feathers of your past no longer belong to. Every now and then we pick up one of these feathers and for a moment feel the weight of the past. Feel the mourning of our loss. It’s okay to pick up a feather to respect your journey. To relearn the lessons of your past but do not hold dear to those feathers. Do not pick them up like bread crumbs and follow them back to where you have been.

What is the goal in holding onto these negative reminders of who you once were. What could you possibly gain for punishing yourself or even others who have wronged you in your past?

We all have our trials by fire and we either choose to embrace the change and use the fire to light our path through the dark shadows of our anger, hurt and regret to carry us through or we drown in our own self pity, negativity and anger.

Either way your old self is dead and gone, you just don’t realize it yet. You will never be that person again. You remain an ugly featherless bird or you pull yourself from the ashes and grow your new set of feathers from which you will learn to fly away with.

Choose to soar.

And remember not to let anyone return those dark feathers for the weight of the world is held inside of them and we were not meant to carry the world.


One thought on “The Phoenix

  1. As I read through your posts, I find that I relate to many of them. I appreciate your honesty and openness. You are a very strong woman and you can do anything you set your mind to. Your life has been and is full of great things. Along the way there are ups and downs, but how we deal with them is what makes us who we are. Being able to be open and talk about your problems in life puts you way ahead of most. I applaud you for being you and being the person you are.

    Liked by 1 person

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